Nairobi News

Everything about social media is exciting and nerve wrecking at the same time. Look at it as sipping coffee that has ice cream. I know many of you have never had such a combo, but hey, relax it exists and yes, it’s both exciting and nerve wrecking.

While going through Instagram search, I espy an interesting selfie so I tap on it. Well, the three ladies on the selfie had very interesting poses, there was a pout, a tongue out and a blank doll stare. This story is of the blank doll. Why her? I stalked the not ‘so’ private account with no ounce of fear.

As I write this article, I know half her life and I will tell you why.

‘Ms Blank Doll’ face has an interesting way of captioning her posts. I admire her need for followers and her dire need to keep them following. Every post had her daily life stories what she ate, who dumped her, what particular time she was dumped, why she was dumped, why she hates her girlfriends and all the 16 year old ‘B.S’

Oh… no… no she is not 16! She looks 32 with the make up, so without the make up let us be fair, kind and humane and place the age tag at 35. Anyway, the pic that opened doors to all this had a somewhat hearty/pained jilted woman and why she hates men.

(Please ladies this is about to get nasty… and to the men you are about to become happier, thank me later.)

Oh goodness! She said she hates men for having been left. Okay, I’m a helper, so I decide to stalk and see what her life was like a year ago. When you stalk people do not just look at the comments, look up the people who commented.

SWEET OL’ MAMA

‘Ms Blank Doll’ seemed to have loads of fans, look, ladies I have no problem if you go posting up nudes, if you post up your newly pierced nipple good for you,’ You got courage’.

My problem comes in when Blank face here decided she can pose half naked with the men who have commented on her pics and get this, all these dudes decided to caption the pics as “Sweet ol’ Mama”, “My MILF”, “The money maker is strutting” etc.

Women, the dating industry has taken a route of extinction. So people call you “Sweet ol’ Mama” and you are complaining of being left?

Let me school you. Men do not get ratchet for you, you get ratchet for them for fact that you want to be wanted. Except men want to caption you as “Damn that butter was thick and sleek”, but you don’t get it. Men are not here to keep you. You are serving buffet on the gram.

Female friend what do you expect that he is going to keep a buffet that many have tasted and referenced on the caption? Please shut your blubber and recollect. I can tell you for free ‘Blank Face’, there’s no coming back for you.

The worst bit in every post that these other buffet tasters had put up she had the gut to comment back to almost all as “Yeah, darn boo we should do that again”

I know how this looks, but it’s my business when it appears on MY search feed. Women blame men all the time, but I don’t understand how you want to be ‘wifed’ while advertising the opposite of it.

KEEP SERVING

Men are getting it easy. All a man has to do is wake up, go to Instagram – remember there’s always this shawty who cannot stand clothes, slide in her dm – call her all the names of the Egyptian goddesses for 16 hours and by the 24th hour she is in an Uber calling him “Bae, I’m almost there.”

Shame, shame, shame, y’all naked bugs are a problem!

So Blank Doll gets a thousand comments of other fellow ratchets telling her “It’s his loss” Girl sit your ass down. It’s your loss! You lost a battle by being one thing that every human being avoids, and that is CHEAP.

Ladies, can we give these men a break and at least let them hunt. You want to be hunted while delivering all your meat on his door. You want him to post you up as “Ride and die” while you are busy riding others and confirming this too?

Looking ancient and above while being called MILF, for a night nut. I have no problem if you are a MILF to your own married partner. Age is but a number.

To the gentlemen out here, look, the odds are in your favor, women are still catching up, they are still getting an education, running the blubber through captions as though that will miraculously solve their ‘ratchet, just dumped problem’.

So dear man, it’s your time to eat your own cake however you wish to serve it.

To the ‘ladies’, keep serving. Yes, you need the likes – tough economy you need heavy numbers somewhere haha!!

Oh, as I said earlier, I’m a helper. I stalked for a reason and of course I left a comment: “Who are we hunting next?”

Guess what? I have a friend request from @… aka “Blank Face”. She ran straight into the trap!