Nairobi News


Dear men, here’s why asking your female BFF to ‘wingman’ you is risky

By Winnie Mabel January 20th, 2024 2 min read

A wingman is a person who helps a friend flirt and seduce with a love interest in the aims of getting them to agree to a romantic liaison with the said friend. This is especially common among male friends who help each other ‘land’ women into ‘situationships’ and relationships.

Becoming a wingman is now becoming common trend among best friend friendships between men and women. As women are more open to receiving information about a guy from a fellow woman compared to a man, some men are now getting their female best friends to act as wingmen for them when they meet someone they are interest in. You can call them wing women.

But then, as with everything in life, there are risks to asking a female bestfriend to act as your wingman when chasing another woman’s skirts.

The first thing you may have to consider is, what if your female BFF has been harboring unrequited romantic feelings for you and was only biding her time? Have you ever felt that your BFF relationship was a bit off compared to other people’s BFF relationships? Has your bestie been behaving more than a bestie in some instances?

Well, the minute you ask her to wingman you, you either end up losing the bestie as you gain a new lover she helps land for you or you end up with a bitter bestie who choses to stick around but becomes a sour friend and makes life uncomfortable for you. Chose your struggle…

If the sour BFF does stick around having successfully acted as your wing woman, do not sit pretty thinking that your new relationships will sail without problems. Your BFF with the hidden feelings may embark on interfering with your new relationship to make your lover uncomfortable and opt to leave. Obviously, by this time you already noticed your BFF had been acting suspicious around you and you will begin wishing you had never asked her to wingman you and remain in oblivion.

Thirdly, some women are uncomfortable with their new lovers having very close female bestfriends. There mere fact she first met your bestfriend before you were introduced to her will make her question your friendship and wonder if your female BFF is helping you get more women when you hang out. You can now imagine the jealousy and animosity that will thicken the atmosphere between the three of you; and how it will be difficult to breathe around the two women in your life.

In the end, it would have been better to ask one of your guy friends to wingman you instead of your female bestfriend. Women are known to better maintain platonic relationships with men over women; so she is bound to spend a lot of time with her male BFF. What more do you need for a disaster recipe than your female BFF constantly being around you and your new lover?

Also read: Cheating scandal rocks Guardian Angel, Esther Musila’s marriage

Muigai Wa Njoroge’s first wife shares emotional burden of husband’s polygamous moves