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Guide for city slay queens travelling upcountry this Christmas


Nairobi’s slay queens, urban women with a pretentious taste for the high end life, are set to take lavish ways to the village as they spend Christmas with loved ones.

However life in the village is not the usual cup of tea for urbanites and requires compromises and adaptations.

Here is a guideline for slay queens intending to travel upcountry for the festivities.

1. Leave your ‘accents’ at the bus station
Remember that English is not the first language for most people living upcountry. In fact it is also not your first language. Don’t sore people’s ears with the fake accents.

2. Do not carry clothes that fit you like a second skin
I get it, your dress your choice. But imagine arriving in your homestead to find the entire clan waiting to greet you and there you are still wearing the thigh-high body con dress because you went partying all night and did not have time to go home and change before taking the bus to shagz.

3. No acrylics and fake eyelashes
Do I even have to say anything about this? Leave the added talons for the city and just go to the village with your God given hand nails and lashes.

4. Don’t ask for champagne at the village local pub
Their will come a time when you will take a break with cousins  to wonder around the village. Most of this excursions always end up at the local pub. Please note that village locals do not stock a variety of drinks. So while in Rome do what Romans do.

5. Six inch heels and 12 inch wigs
I am assuming that the trip made to upcountry is not only see loved ones but also to relax. So carry and wear comfortable shoes. And let’s be honest, most shags still use firewood, you do not want to risk the smoke and possibility of the wig catching fire.