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How your lover’s best friend can make your relationship difficult

Some say there can never be a platonic relationship between a close male and female who call each other besties. Apparently, one of them has to be secretly nursing feelings for the other. Many people tend to freak out when they get to know someone and learn they have a bestie who is the opposite gender.

This is because they have heard all the testimonies, allegations and stereotypes that these besties have a relationship that is too close for comfort (bestie, bestie, chubwi – if you know, you know) and they may end up or are already doing things people in erotic relationships do.

But then, not every bestie is all about having a romantic relationship undercover. Some could be genuine besties who see their friends as closer than a sibling after a lifetime of experiences together.

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That said, it does not mean that these genuine besties aren’t a threat to their friend’s romantic relationships. Nairobi News lists the ways in which such kind of besties tend to ruin relationships for a couple:

  1. Jealousy and insecurity: A partner may feel threatened or insecure due to the close bond between their significant other and their best friend. This can lead to feelings of jealousy, distrust, and potential conflicts within the relationship. This is where when an argument arises, you will find the bestie’s name being dragged into the drama.
  2. Lack of boundaries: If boundaries are not clearly established and respected, the involvement of a best friend of the opposite gender can sometimes blur the lines between friendship and romantic partnership. This can create confusion and raise concerns about emotional or physical infidelity. At this point, you have no one else to blame if your partner begins looking at you sideways and doubting the strength of your love.
  3. Communication breakdown: If open and honest communication is lacking, misunderstandings and misinterpretations may occur. This can be especially true when discussing the best friend’s role in the relationship or addressing any concerns that may arise.
  4. Neglecting the partner: Spending excessive time and energy with a best friend of the opposite gender could potentially lead to neglecting the romantic partner’s needs and desires. This can create feelings of neglect, loneliness, or being less important in the relationship.
  5. External influences and opinions: The presence of a best friend of the opposite gender might invite external opinions and influences from friends, family, or society, which can add further strain to the relationship dynamics.

It’s important to note that these effects may not be experienced in all relationships. Every relationship is unique, and the impact of opposite-gender best friends depends on the individuals involved, their trust, communication skills, and the overall health of the relationship.

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