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The casualness of today’s dating life would jolt the gods

A close friend recently tweeted that she can’t comprehend how one would date for 10 years.

Okay, 10 years is a lifetime, really.

By that’s not what incensed me about the seemingly hilarious tweet.


Rather her confession that one year into a relationship, she has spent every possible cartridge, and at this point, she has to hop on to a different game.

“I can’t get comfortable; let’s explore the world,” she tweeted with an accompanying laughing emoji.

Well, this seems to be a thing these days. It got me thinking.

Discussions on radio and TV shows, podcasts and even on social media are all too predictable. They also seem to have one collective end: give dating and relationships a bad name.

Protagonists of this poisonous gospel mock dating couples and all the good things about loving.

Commitment is frowned upon and adventure glorified. The more people you curve, the more honour you earn.

Call me conservative, as well you might, but what’s the point of going out on dinner dates, hanging out on long intimate weekends and sharing lotsa interesting things with someone only to quit even before the heart has quite figured out the devil what all the glory is about?

A relationship these days typically ends after a few rounds of sex, hangouts and drinks. That’s if you’re lucky to meet the person after the first date.


She need not tell you when the romp is over. You’ll get the cue from her offish behaviour. If not, she’ll post drunken photos of the people she’s fucking. To provoke you to piss off.

If you last a month in a relationship, you have the gods by your side. If three months go by, you just could be destined for a long exciting journey ahead.

If you clock six months, you’re either hanging on to each other because of the fear of starting all over again. Or you’re truly truly into each other. Forevs.

Are people so hopeless about relationships of commitment? Are relationships of the here and now so stylish? Momentary thrill?

The casualness of today’s dating life would jolt the gods.

You also don’t have to give a hoot about your partner thereafter. You aren’t responsible for their emotions, are you?

I’ve lost count of couples who have dumped or been dumped by their partners online. Such shame.

There’s an explanation though. Putting your love life out there for all to see.

Whatever happened to the good old days when lovers would do their stuff in silence. Love in silence. Be discreet about their disputes. Quietly part ways.


Just what happened, people?

These days people can’t break up without staging theatrics. Is it bitterness? Revenge?

If you constantly seek the approval of the online community in your affairs, don’t be surprised at how fast they turn away from you when the dung hits the fan.

See, people love drama. They’ll ask you to love that girl, take her on a date. They’ll tell you why you must bed him, bear him a child.

When the centre can’t hold anymore, same crowd will be on hand to ask you to drop your partner ASAP.

If their tips are so effective, why can’t they apply them to perfect their relationship?

Ever heard that the wisdom of a mob is equivalent to that of the dumbest of the lot? If the story of Jesus’ crucifixion can’t teach you, you can’t learn.

Leave people and their counsel alone

Let’s love genuinely again, shall we?