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Woman marries herself; it’s called sologamy – PHOTOS

September 28th, 2017 2 min read

An Italian woman has married herself in a ceremony complete with white dress, three-layer wedding cake, bridesmaids and 70 guests.

“I firmly believe that each of us must first of all love ourselves,” said Laura Mesi, a 40-year-old fitness trainer. “You can have a fairytale even without the prince.”

The ceremony carries no legal weight.

But Ms Mesi is part of a growing trend for self-marriage – dubbed “sologamy” – in countries around the world.

Proponents of such ceremonies say it is about self-love and acceptance, and claiming the social affirmation normally reserved for couples who wed.

Laura is part of a growing trend for self-marriage - dubbed 'sologamy'. PHOTO | COURTESY
Laura is part of a growing trend for self-marriage – dubbed ‘sologamy’. PHOTO | COURTESY

Laura says the idea of a solo wedding came to her two years ago, after a 12-year relationship ended.

“I told friends and family that if I had not found my soul-mate by my 40th birthday I would marry myself,” she told La Repubblica newspaper.

“If one day I find a man with whom I can plan a future I’ll be happy, but my happiness does not depend on him.”

Ms Mesi says she is the first Italian woman to hold a solo ceremony. In May, a man, Nello Ruggiero, said “yes” to himself in a ceremony in Naples.

In Japan, a travel agency began offering bridal ceremonies for single women in 2014.

Reports of people marrying themselves go as far back as 1993. It has spawned a number of books and been a theme of episodes of Sex and the City and Glee.

In the US, a website called I Married Me offers self-wedding kits. In Canada, an agency called Marry Yourself Vancouver which has been running for more than a year attributes the rise in solo weddings to the growing numbers of single people.

PHOTO | COURTESY
PHOTO | COURTESY

“Single is the new normal. Celebrate your solo status!” it urges.

But not everyone welcomes the trend, with some calling it narcissistic, and others criticising it as a pointless submission to a patriarchal institution.

Among the congratulatory comments left on Ms Mesi’s wedding photos are others: “So sad”, “you’re out of your mind” and “there’s something wrong with your brain”.

Last month, British self-wedder Sophie Tanner told BBC some people called her “a sad feminist”.

Ms Mesi has brushed off the catty comments, saying “nothing and no-one can turn off my smile”.

But in media interviews she acknowledges that solo weddings might not be for everyone. To marry yourself, she says, you need a certain amount of money, the support of those around you, and – above all – “a pinch of madness”.

Courtesy BBC Online