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Ladies, here is what the Nairobi bachelor truly wants

Fake hair, fake nails, fake bums and fake busts are just a sample of the extreme measures women adopt to catch that elusive ‘perfect’ Nairobi bachelor. But they couldn’t be more wrong.

Here’s what the Nairobi man really wants:

1. Respect – The society raises men to be respected and when he gets into a relationship with a woman, he expects it. In fact, he thrives on it.

If a man is one of the good ones, then he will inspire respect from you. Even when he isn’t, it is in your best interest and that of your relationship that you desist from making your man feel inadequate.

Even when you need to give feedback on your relationship, desist from questioning his abilities. His ego is very important to him.

2. Recognition – The Nairobi man wants recognition. It is ingrained in him so much so that this need will sometimes have him making illogical decision. A need for recognition is why a man who is barely settled in his first job will take out a loan to buy the infamous blue Subaru.

This need is still there even when he is in a relationship. And you can feed this need by publicly acknowledging and appreciating his successes.

If you are also a successful woman, it will not hurt to step away from the spotlight every so often so that your man can shine. It will help him feel more secure in his masculinity and in the long run, he will be a better man for you.

3. Silence – Just like introverts often need time away from people to be alone so that they can recharge, a man needs to retreat into his man cave every so often to regroup. The good news is that if you are keen, you can tell when it is that time for him.

If he is quiet or appears to be withdrawing, desist from attempting to draw him back to the present. Stop asking him what he is thinking. He will be better company if you allow him to recharge. Make yourself busy.

4. Food – When your mother told you that the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach, she was right. True, in today’s fast paced world, there’s barely enough time to get your to-do-list done, let alone rolling up your sleeves over a hot cooker.

Still, it is important that you ensure that your man is well fed. You do not need to become a gourmet chef. Just make sure his stomach is full when he leaves the house. The upside of this is that when you cook, you are in charge of the ambience. You can turn off the lights, light up some candles, put on some soothing music and add romance to your relationship.

5. Sex – Sex is important to a Nairobi man – all men. A woman wants to be wined and dined but a man is wired to need sexual affirmation. He needs to feel desired by the woman in his life. This goes a long way in making him feel secure in a relationship. Be affectionate and do not try to use sex as a weapon or a bargaining chip in your relationship. Remember, there are many options and temptations in a man’s world.