EXCLUSIVE: Tim Njiru on why you should not spend much while dating
In today’s world, dating emerges as a profound and relentless pursuit for connection.
It is a journey marked with vulnerability, discovery and exploration of compatibility between two hearts and minds- seeking to know if they will have the chemistry and emotions to push the relationship beyond a one night stand or a ‘situationship’ to a long lasting relationship.
Dating- whether casually or intentionally- is a period where one’s hunger for intimacy declares itself. It may be fruitless or fruitful but the journey to find the right person often resemble a treasure hunt, one not without its own financial costs and investments including time and energy.
People will spend money on dinners, adventurous outings and romantic escapades but as the wallets grown lighter, the heart grows wiser- learning the lessons on whether the other heart is compatible with theirs and the relationship could possibly work out.
However, according to media personality turned pilot Mr Tim Njiru, dating is simply a game of data collection and one should strive to spend much less going on them and using the money to invest in self first.
“Dating is simply collecting data. The first date must be a coffee date and strictly beverage date. Make that very clear- its not a feeding program. Also, the first date is enough to know whether this is going on or not. Date with your ears and not with your eyes. Make up nowadays has made everything look the same. Invest in yourself first. Get that degree, get that new skill, start that business or join that investment group. Secure yourself first and pick that good shirt, and make sure there’s food in your clean house,” began Mr Njiru.
He applied the same line of thought when it comes to sherehe (partying).
“There’s a birthday every day and there’s a party somewhere every single day. Be very picky with the parties and birthdays to attend and when you do, know when to leave the party,” added Mr Njiru.
He went on to reveal he had adapted this self investment first approach over dating and sherehe, adding that, ” a matatu must move to the next bus stop for it to have passengers in full capacity. “Matatu Haikai Kwa stage, inasonga ikibeba (the matatu does not spend much time at the stage waiting for passengers, it moves as it collects passengers along the road).
How about group outings to dinners and trips? Does he apply line of thought when it comes to spending money?
“What is the otuting about, who is planning for it, where is it and how am I supposed to show up for it? If it is within and fits your pocket, by all means play your role. If it doesn’t, be very clear from the get-go,” concluded Mr Njiru.
As his sentiments may be hard to swallow for some, he was of the opinion that people who agreed with his thoughts of spending less on dates to invest in self should “find people they can yoke with because it makes life very easy.”