House-hunting in Nairobi? Go through this Twitter ‘timeline’ first
A Twitter user outlined the stereotypes that are associated with most estates in Nairobi, which will come in handy for anyone doing house-hunting.
Though undated, the tweets by Kawaii Kaiju (@RedSabin) are crafted in a hilarious manner and are in fact not entirely fictional as most of his followers tended to agree.
From tiny bedrooms being as spacious in Jamhuri estate to the crime rate in Githurai, the man appears to have done his homework properly.
Below is the ‘timeline’:
Lakini Ruaka huwa noma … unacheki 2 bedroom kali lakini ni 10k … ni vile wanajua watakujia balance hiyo usiku
— Kawaii Kaiju 可愛い 怪獣 (@RedSabin) November 25, 2016
Kinoo nayo ni ngori. Unaenda kuview Nyumba na agent ..unashindwa kwani huyu agent ako na diabetes anajidunga sindano …kumbe ni ya tetanus
— Kawaii Kaiju 可愛い 怪獣 (@RedSabin) November 25, 2016
Ukitembea tembea kidogo ..kuna pale Imara Daima … lmao …hapo mtu huenda kuwa blood donor … Mosquito ziko na snapchat aisee
— Kawaii Kaiju 可愛い 怪獣 (@RedSabin) November 25, 2016
Halafu pale TRM … hapo ukiishi ni mandatory ukuwe na supra za purple kuenda pale TRM Saturday na meakins kwa chupa ya dasani
— Kawaii Kaiju 可愛い 怪獣 (@RedSabin) November 25, 2016
Tukiendelea, kuna hii base … Jamhuri … Nyumba hapo 1 bedroom ni 25k lakini ukishaweka meko ya 6kg na Timbaland pair moja, nyumba imejaa
— Kawaii Kaiju 可愛い 怪獣 (@RedSabin) November 25, 2016
Halafu … kuna pale Githurai … lmao .. hapo maisha ni peaceful …keja ziko sawa.. mko tu sawa ……. juu nyinyi wote ni wakora
— Kawaii Kaiju 可愛い 怪獣 (@RedSabin) November 25, 2016
Sijamaliza ….. kuna KU …. hostels … hapo nyinyi ni SGR ya bed bugs ..lmao …
— Kawaii Kaiju 可愛い 怪獣 (@RedSabin) November 25, 2016
Cheki ..halafu kuna hii route ya Waithaka/Seti … hahaha … huko “executive finishes” ni poster za “usikojoe hapa” :’D :’D
— Kawaii Kaiju 可愛い 怪獣 (@RedSabin) November 25, 2016
