Akothee: Fame almost made me lose it
It seems that it is not all glitz and glamour when it comes to the life of singer Akothee. According to the mother of five she has been battling with mental wellness ever since she became famous.
Akothee says she was struggling with living her life authentically without offending anyone. Being famous she says came with its own baggage. Having to come to terms with accepting a new life of being a virtual parent and pretending to look happy whenever she gets accosted by fans.
“Battled it and came out alive. I was battling a monster in my head. Something was messing up with my brain, I was struggling inside a body fighting to live and a mind ready to switch off. I was overwhelmed with outbursts and uncontrolled.
I was struggling with being me without offending anyone, I was struggling to accept what fame throws at me. I was accepting that at some point I will have to let quite A lot go,” Akothee said.
“I was struggling with letting some people out of my life without hurting them & love them from far, oooh yes I was struggling with accepting that most of the time I will have to parent virtually and all the huge mansions left for me the dogs and the birds.
I was struggling with not feeling bad when I meet fans who are excited to see me and I was not in the mood of seeing anyone excited, at some point it felt like naggings, phone calls were irritable and I saw most of the people coming for me and not to me. Ohh yes, I was struggling for my space,” she said.
All these emotions piled up in her to a point that she almost lost it. Her condition later developed to her waking up feeling numb on one side of her body.
“I almost lost it I felt suffocated with a lot. At some point I could not breathe at night just from the blues, I would ask my partner to open the windows, I was suffocating.
From one night to the other, I woke up with my left side numb, the numbness spread from my neck to my leg. I woke up with one side completely feeling dead. I panicked and from one day to the next, I lost energy on my left arm, not able to lift anything.
“I developed pinched nerve and I was due for surgery, I equally developed a lot of pain in my left ear. After several hospital visits, I moved out of my mansions and went to put up with my sister-in-law.
She has 3 kids and I could only get some sleep when I heard children’s voices. When any of my friends called me, I would just start crying, for no reason. I felt alone in the world full of human beings,” she explained.
“I lost energy and was completely exhausted sucked up and sucked out. I was put on antidepressants which made me even worse.
My emotions were doubled and crazy panic attacks. From one day to the next I needed stronger sleeping tablets. One day I asked a doctor to just inject me with a strong sleeping medicine so I can sleep.”
Since 2019 Akothee has been sharing how she has been in and out of the hospital. In the same year, she was hospitalised days after returning from Dubai.
Last year she was admitted briefly to a hospital where she later revealed that she had been experiencing constant headaches for five days.