Nairobi News


Bitange Ndemo’s long search for a wife

By Amina Wako December 21st, 2019 2 min read

Former Permanent Secretary in the Ministry of Information and Communications, Bitange Ndemo, has opened up about the struggles he went through as he was looking for a wife.

Speaking on the inspirational talk, Engage, Prof Ndemo also revealed some of the ‘odd’ things he did to get a wife without success.


Prof Ndemo, who grew up in a polygamous family, says that as a young man, he always wanted to be like his polygamous and authoritarian father.

He also narrates how as a teenager he never succeeded in getting a girlfriend.

“I had older brothers who were never honest with me. I kept asking them what I should do to get a girlfriend, and they always told me the easiest way was by applying the sap an aloe vera plant and that if I greeting any girl I fancied, she would follow me,” Prof Ndemo narrates.

Of course it never worked.

Years later, Prof Ndemo moved from Kisii to Nairobi where he resumed chasing young women in the city.

He narrates how on one occasion he sprayed himself with a whole can of cologne to catch the attention of a lady he admired in church.

That too, and many other audacious escapades, never worked.


Shortly, he left Kenya to study in the United States of America, where he experienced the culture shock of female students asking him out on dates.

Upon completing his undergraduate studies and working for a while in the US, he returned home briefly with a promise to find himself a wife.

When he arrived in Kenya, he decided to go and see an elder brother who is a lecturer at the Unversity of Nairobi’s School of Medicine.

“I wanted my brother to give me his car so that I could go around looking for a wife,” he narrates.

However, he found his brother busy in class and he decided to relax at the cafeteria where he was joined by two young ladies.

His chance encounter at the cafeteria saw him land a date the very evening with one of the ladies who also showed interest in him.


A week later, he shared the story with a relative who discouraged him against getting involved with the lady, claiming she was a heavy drinker.

He didn’t take the advice, though, because he had made up his mind.

Shortly thereafter, he returned to the US, but his efforts to have his new-found love joining him there never worked out as she was denied visa by the American Embassy.

Thankfully, she secured a Canadian Visa and visited the country severally as their love blossomed.

Prof Ndemo eventually ended up marrying that lady he accidentally met at the university cafeteria.

The two are happily married, almost 30 years into his marriage.