This sex thread will make your day
A Nairobian’s Twitter thread of messages narrating hours of torture under his girlfriend’s bed has lit up the internet.
The thread had a blow by blow account of how the young man passed by the house of his girlfriend’s parents for sex and the two slept for hours only for the girl’s mother to come home from work.
The man was forced to hide under the bed and in his thread he narrates how the mother made 4 o’clock tea and supper while he was still under the bed.
He spices up his narration by describing how the girl slipped a plate of food under the bed for him to eat with his stomach pressed down on the cold floor.
The man had to sleep on the bed for a few hours after the girl’s mother went to sleep but woke up in the wee hours.
The encounter was widely shared as other users sympathized with the “boy child.”
Here is the viral thread:
Nililala chini ya bed kwakina dem kwa simiti hadi morning. THREAD.
— Billy (@Crazy_Nairobian) August 27, 2017
Tulikuwa tumefunga Colle so kila mtu ni kujitupa makwao. Yengs akadai nimpeleke stage ya kwao so tulipitia hom kwetu nika drop bags kwanza..
— Billy (@Crazy_Nairobian) August 27, 2017
Kufika stage yengs hakutaka ma goodbyes bana, yaani mtoto wa mtu ni wale wakikupenda wanapenda hadi na maini. Akadai nifike kwao nijue huko.
— Billy (@Crazy_Nairobian) August 27, 2017
Ilikuwa 12:30 mraiya tukajitupa ndani ya nisso za kwao hadi town centre yao, tukaingia kibanda kukula chips na toothpick ???
— Billy (@Crazy_Nairobian) August 27, 2017
After lunj tukashuka kwao kwa nduthi, hiyo ride ilikuwa mahanjam tupu.
Mamake ni single mum na ni mwalimu so hakuwa area— Billy (@Crazy_Nairobian) August 27, 2017
Yengs akadai tujitibu chai na mkate nikisorora family album ya kwao, hiyo family ilikuwa ya fine ghels tupu bana…
— Billy (@Crazy_Nairobian) August 27, 2017
Hao yao ilikuwa room tatu.. yaani sitting room, bedroom na jikoni, yengs alikuwa anadoz jikoni coz ilikuwa kubwa kiasi…
— Billy (@Crazy_Nairobian) August 27, 2017
After chai tukaona tupeane mate juu nikama mwili zilikuwa zinadai haki yao, mjulubeng ilikuwa tayari inaimba national anthem ndanj ya boxer.
— Billy (@Crazy_Nairobian) August 27, 2017
Shot moja ikageuka shot mbili, kidogo kidogo shot ya tatu ikafuata… ikabidi mraiya tumedoz juu ya kuchoka…
— Billy (@Crazy_Nairobian) August 27, 2017
Kitu 4 apo kamvua kakaanza ikabidi tumerudi kujiekelea hadi ipunguke.. mahns the devil is a liar, tulishtuliwa na kelele ya nduthi nje…
— Billy (@Crazy_Nairobian) August 27, 2017
Ilikuwa 5:30 tayari na mamake alikuwa amefika, acha tuvae nguo speedy speedy.. yengs akanisho nijisunde chini ya bed kwanza..
— Billy (@Crazy_Nairobian) August 27, 2017
Boys nikatii nikaingia hataka upesi chini ya bed, alafu simiti ilikuwa baridi juu kulikuwa kumenuesha bana
— Billy (@Crazy_Nairobian) August 27, 2017
Hapo chini ya bed ilikuwa kupiga timing, nikaweka phone silent coz nyang’au inaeza call ujipate unakatwa rasa na majirani juu bana..
— Billy (@Crazy_Nairobian) August 27, 2017
Mamake akingia akaekelea shopping chini akaamua kuekelea chai.. mi nlikuwa naona tu miguu zao. Saa hiyo si breath hata juu naeza sneeze bana
— Billy (@Crazy_Nairobian) August 27, 2017
After what seemed like forever ya hao kuvura chai moto wakipeana fake news za kijiji, mamake akaekelea mboga za supper…
— Billy (@Crazy_Nairobian) August 27, 2017
Hiyo time yote ni mamake alikuwa anafanya kila kitu, yengs ni mushene tu na alikuwa anafanya Diploma in food & beverage… nkt!
— Billy (@Crazy_Nairobian) August 27, 2017
Saa moja ikafika bana nkajua niko in deep shit coz kwetu ni mbali, mamangu akaanza kuni call, juu phone ilikuwa silent ilikuwa inawaka tu…
— Billy (@Crazy_Nairobian) August 27, 2017
Boy child nilikuwa na 7 missed call za mathe, hawa nao ndo walikuwa wanaekelea ugali sasa na bado wako hapo jikoni…
— Billy (@Crazy_Nairobian) August 27, 2017
Chini ya bed nilikuwa na rotate pole pole ka earth kwa orbit niki shift position ya kulala juu ya kuchoka bana. 7:30 wakaanza kukula supper
— Billy (@Crazy_Nairobian) August 27, 2017
Boys nilikuwa nameza tu mate apo chini coz njaa nayo ilikuwa majority. 8:00 wakaamua kuenda ku watch soap sasa ndo mraiya nika breath…
— Billy (@Crazy_Nairobian) August 27, 2017
But yengs alikabi kiasi aka sneak ugali na mboga uko chini ya bed then akani text “Beb am sorry”… sasa ndo nilikula nare kabisa…
— Billy (@Crazy_Nairobian) August 27, 2017
Umewai kula ka umelalia tumbo kwa sakafu? My fren hizi ikus zitakuja kutuua siku moja… nilikula na wasi wasi bana…
— Billy (@Crazy_Nairobian) August 27, 2017
